I think I wrote about this before but today the message bears repeating, that prayer changes things. I believe it with all my heart but there are those times, like today, that I can do nothing but stand in awe of the magnitude of the power and presence of God.
I have learned not to question, God why? I don't question His many blessings and I don't question other things either. Rather I choose to trust and believe He is sovereign, in control of every detail and aspect of life - yesterday, today, and forever.
I don't think of myself as a worrier, although sometimes it visits. I just try not to let it move in. My daughter considers herself a worrier and battles downright fear at times. We've talked about it, she knows it's irrational and hates it. Something happened today that she can look back on and cling to, a miracle from the very hand of God. There is simply no other way to explain it. Two days ago, after attending the funeral of a former youth pastor, (who in our finite minds died too young, leaving behind a wife, 5 children, and a church family) she was gripped with irrational fear concerning her two most precious gifts from God. She cried out to God, asking Him to watch over and protect them both from the things she had absolutely no control over, acknowledging they belonged to Him before they belonged to her. Then this morning Collin asked if he could go outside to play in the spot where he and his sister played the other day while mom was inside praying and crying out to God... He was told 'no' by both mom and dad, to wait until it warmed up some. Shortly after, he hollered from the kitchen after watching a huge tree fall on the exact spot where they sat playing days before. A tree so huge I cannot even look at the photo because the thought of it is so upsetting. At the same time, I rejoice and thank God for answering our prayers each day for their safety and protection. Prayers that easily can become routine but now are vital and alive.
As I tried to digest it all, my mind drifted back to a day 9 years ago when I received a frantic telephone call from my sister whose 4 children were struck in their vehicle on the expressway by a woman who had been drinking and rammed into them at a high speed, completely totaling the car. Thank God, none of them were injured. Their mom was a state away preparing for a family funeral and the kids were on their way when this happened. Any mother would fall apart at this but my words to her then came back to me tonight almost verbatim. I said, "don't think about what might have been, just thank God for what is, your children are fine and you must focus on that." I repeated those words to myself tonight and my unsettled heart was quieted.
Fear is a place I don't want to visit or live. So as I rest my head this night, I will pour my heart out to God in thanksgiving. I will thank him that my precious grandkids are safe this night. I will thank him, again, that my precious nieces and nephews were kept safe on that expressway 9 years ago. I will thank him for all the times in between that I know about and even the things I know not. I will thank him that my words in prayer don't fall on deaf ears but are taken to the very throne of grace and heard by the one who is an ever present help in our time of need, the one who goes before us, watches over us, hems us in behind and before, the only one who knows the end from the beginning. He wrote the story and I trust Him.
I acknowledge these words to be true for me and my family and say with David,
"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in - behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain." Psalm 139:1-6
It was her mommy's first day back to work following maternity leave so we tried to soften the blow by staying home with her. I don't know who enjoyed it more, grammy or papa. I know papa got lots of smiles which kept him smiling into the night. Auntie Meg and cousin Madelyn stopped by in the afternoon while Collin was in school. Madelyn & Claire are bound to have some fun together in the years to come! 
